So, I have been reminiscing about the past and the future recently, well, tonight more or less. And quite frankly I am very, very surprised how much I have changed. I mean, everyone changes but no one notices really. My acquaintance Ali once told me a quote, "day to day nothing changes, but in a blink of an eye it's all different." And I guess I blinked. Though I still feel like I'm the traditional good guy, and I know I am still loud and outspoken, many things have changed about me. I have added more to my to-do list of 2012, but it isn't a resolution per se, just promises to myself. (If you see those as any different, I do.)
Side-step with me for a minute to one of my resolution's. Getting in shape. a million people have this goal, very, very few will accomplish it. And I think the reason is because they don't have a motivation to. I mean husbands do it for their wives, and vise versa, but what does the spouse replies when they fail, "I love you just the way you are." Which is true (hopefully) but he/she doesn't recognize that that hurts the person trying to get in shape. They aren't really doing it for their spouse, they are doing it for themselves, they just don't want to fail on their own... Single people do it to look better for the opposite (or same) sex... But that isn't a "person" and so when men/women are fawning on you the instant you walk out of the gym, it's kinda doomed to failure, in my opinion anyway.
With that being said, I think I found a reason to keep me motivated, and it is because I want to dance and sing.
Dancing: People who are in shape look better in nice clothes and while dancing, plain and simple. Not to mention it actually takes some foot work and movement. I have been dancing that Grahams on and off for a while, and I think I am going to start going more often and asking random girls to dance and practice with me. I'm not terribly good yet, but I want to be. I used to think dancing was very intimate, mainly because Homecoming, Winter formal, and Prom all basically require dates to have fun, and there isn't really a time where your guy friend takes your girlfriend to the dance floor. Just didn't happen. The only time I ever danced with a girl who wasn't my girlfriend before Grahams was at my brothers wedding. I danced with my sister, and I danced with my sister-in-law. Anyway, my views have recently changed. Dancing is dancing. A fun activity to do with one other person, sometimes it is intimate, other times it's not. On a Thursday a couple weeks ago I was learning the Cha-Cha and I danced with like... 15 different ladies and women, some far better than me, others notsomuch. It was done for practice with other people, and by the time I got back around to my partner (Ashley) we had a grasp of what we were doing. And it is FUN.
Singing: I am now a regular at Tilted Kilt... I know all of the other regulars, all of the night hostesses, servers, bouncers, busboys, bartenders, managers, and one of the cooks. So well, in fact, we've all added each other on Facebook and have had occasions where we've hung out outside of Facebook. Just a nice community-type family that supports each other. A lot of nights like tonight we get our server Amber, we didn't sit in her section, but she "stole" us from the other server because we are her regulars (Makes us feel special.) Now, before I was invited to Tilted Kilt, I didn't like karaoke. I couldn't sing, thought it was too loud, annoying, and there for stupid drunks. Again my thoughts have changed on that matter. I absolutely love karaoke night. It is the one night I will always go and every night I look forward to. I want to continue doing that for as long as TK has Mike as the karaoke DJ. I like my booming voice, I like working on my country voice, I like the games involved and being forced to sing songs out of my comfort zone.
Coincidentally, this kinda leads into my original point, I've changed. This time last year, I wasn't singing and I wasn't dancing. I was happy in some ways and others I wasn't. I craved friendship that I didn't really have with some people. I no longer have that desire with those people. I've matured, but only to a certain extent. I've grown spiritually and my ideas and values, and though most are within the gray area, they are marked for me to understand.
I am a regular at TK, but Sam, the manager, was talking to me tonight and some of the regulars she/we know have been going there every Sunday for the past three years since the place opened. I have only been going for... four months maybe? It's crazy to think that it has only been that long. I can not wait till she can say that about me three years down the line.
It's an adventure I look forward to.
~Just a thought.
It seems that day to day, nothing changes. But in a blink of an eye, it's all different - Ali.