Friday, March 23, 2012

An epiphany of sorts.

1. A sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality oressential meaning of something, usually initiated by somesimple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.

I went and met my friend Megan for breakfast the other day. Her and I hit up McDonald's, as it is cheap and I don't like their breakfast, so my spending is $2 on a drink and hashbrown. I get their early since I was at work, and I proceeded to bring in my laptop from work, because I have been meaning to do some productive work, and why not do it there? Free Wi-fi anyway. So I load up, browse CareerBuilder and Craigslist for jobs, a few potentials. In case you didn't know, I've been looking for a second job, preferably part time, but full time is looking for promising. Anyway, so I do that, read a couple articles that I have flagged from LifeHacker and Gizmodo send me that I would find interesting. She shows up, have a great laugh, she gets a business card from a creeper who is failing at his own career (it sounds mean, but he was a joke in my opinion.) We had fun and she went off to something she had going on and I end up mailing myself these potential job choices to review when I get home then I drove home.

I haven't touched those e-mails since.

..... So I am lazy. I know this, those who know me know this, those who have read my blog know this. I have started as many diets on HERE than I ever have. I've been motivated and unmotivated so many times I really think it is a syndrome. Not depression or Bi-polar, mind you, but laziness-syndrome.

I have always been frustrated as to WHY. The WHY that made me lazy. I've tried many things, but the only conclusion I could come up with was that I had Willpower before, and now I don't.

But that couldn't have been the case when I was at McD's right? At first I thought it was because I was on my work computer and there isn't anything better to do, but I think that's the point. I never really understood why people go to Starbucks and sit there on their computer for hours. For some reason I thought they just didn't have internet at home, which is probably true for a few, but being at Starbucks, or McD's, or OUT of the house gets rid of the distractions. I was amazingly productive when I was at McD's just waiting for Megan.

So again, I ask myself WHY am I lazy at home? I finally believe it to be my computer... My room is designed for no laziness except my computer! My alarm clock and closet are the farthest away from my bed as possible, I have work out equipment on both sides, a calendar that says "10 PUSH UPS AND 50 SITUPS EVERY MORNING) on my wall... But I sit here on my computer and do NOTHING for hours on end. Seriously... A part of me aches when I am on my computer browsing old comic strips looking back at my unfolded laundry, I find folding very therapeutic and lets me think, but I accept it sits in my basket. From my computer desk I also look at my push-up bar, in which is laying against my wall, KNOWING that doing ten push-ups and twenty crunches would take less than 10 minutes, 15 if I pushed myself. Then, when I get hungry, I look downstairs from my chair, complaining cause I am hungry and I want to cook something, but have nothing in the cupboard. Now I'm thinking which fast food joint sounds good, and then start scouring Facebook for someone to go with me so I have the excuse to go to Burger King instead of Wal-mart. If I can't find anyone, I head to fast food anyway, then just head to my dads. Company is always present there.

Even on the computer itself I can't seem to do productive work. Facebook is always up, so are my comic strips I read regularly, Gmail, and then your selection of Youtube/Hulu/Netflix/Escapist or porn. That is what I do on my computer at home. This PC is just not being used for any productive work anymore. I don't have Photoshop, nor do I write while I'm here.

That being said... I have decided to take my computer rig down. I mean, I don't even play video games on it anymore. I have a list that I have purchased, but not played. I just don't do it really. So I am going to unplug it and move it to my closet. I think the only reasons to bring it out is if for some reason I have friends who want to play a multiplayer game (SC2, LFD2, and Minecraft). Or if I have arranged Skype time with friends from around the world.

I have Facebook at work and on my phone. I have my work laptop when I quickly need to get online for something important. But this whole wasting of my day needs to stop.
So I am an IT guy without a computer.

I think I am going to take a day or two out of the week to visit various Starbucks's and do work on my laptop for myself. Maybe right after I hit up the gym, which is sporadic, but I do go. Drink a nice tea or something.

I also plan on hanging my dogs leashes on my walls to get me to go more. I used to love taking them for walks. I leave their leashes in my car normally, I tell myself it's because when they get IN my car I want to make sure I have them. Unfortunately, out of sight out of mind works that way too, and if it isn't RIGHT there for me to grab, my computer just looks far more comfier.

Even IF my laziness turns into just a lot of reading from my unfinished books or Gizmodo off my phone, that is a win for me.

That's the latest updates I want to share today. Have a good one, and always find a way to better your life. You only got one.
~Just a thought

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